What I’ve Learned My First Month in Montana

It’s November, which means I have just spent my first full month living in Montana.  I’m now officially a resident, well sorta.  I’m resident enough to have a Montana drivers license, but not resident enough to purchase inexpensive hunting and fishing licenses.  That will take another 5 months.  But at least I can begin saving enough money to get my Toyota FJ registered.  Most of Montana has no sales tax, so one of the ways to generate funds is by charging unusually high rates to register your car (at least compared to Pennsylvania).  That’s one of the things I’ve learned in my first month of quasi-residency.  Here’s a few more:

 

1. 50-60 mile per hour wind in Livingston is just a little “breezy.”  Locals say that doesn’t really get windy here until you can fly your trucker hat like a kite.

2.  Jalapeno corn dogs are very delicious and can be purchased with over-sized beers at Town Pump convenience stores.

3. Whitefish really like small nymphs.  Which is OK because I sorta like whitefish…just don’t tell anyone.

4. Whitetail deer are dumber than mule deer.  Why is it that most of the critters that have attempted to commit suicide by running in front of my car while I’m on my way to work are whitetails?  The mulies tend to stand back and just watch their reckless, half-witted cousins act foolishly. Sounds like my last family reunion.

5. The Absaroka Mountain range is pronounced Ab-soar-key. Not Ab-sa-ro-ka. So I need to quit saying it that way.

6. Calamity Jane lived in Livingston, but no one I know knows where she lived in Livingston.

7. Dan Gigone, the owner of Sweetwater Fly Shop, used to have a pretty sweet chin beard.

8. Yellowstone River fishing guides drink just as much beer as Delaware River fishing guides.

9. It doesn’t really matter if you forget to take a photograph of today’s sunrise or sunset–tomorrow’s will be just as spectacular.

10. Unlike tigers, grizzly bears hate pepper but love cinnamon.

11.  Marya Spoja, Sweetwater Fly Shop’s manager, used to play the trumpet.  Now she just catches big trout.

12. PBR is now owned by the Russians.  Could this lead to world peace?

13.  There are rabbits here so large that they look like albino kangaroos.  They do not believe that Trix is for kids.

14. Montana brown trout eat the same streamers that Pennsylvania brown trout eat.

15. It’s illegal to eat sunflower seeds in Yellowstone National Park.  It’s also illegal to ride a bison, though they really seem like they want you to try.

 


2 Comments so far

Definitely several fun facts to share. Would love to see a few pictures of the sunrises/sunsets. BTW – Love your header image!

You are a fantastic writer. I can close my eyes and picture everything you are talking about. Good luck in Montana.

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